Cream Cheese and Poppy Seeds

When I die you guys better bloody well just chuck my corpse into a homemade, plywood box and throw it in a hole, because I can't imagine spending mucho dinero on something as worthless as a coffin. Better yet, get a cardboard box, that way you won't have to waste the time and money on making one out of plywood. Or you could just wrap my lifeless corpse with plastic wrap or tinfoil. I suppose that one would be considered littering, but no one really cares about the planet anyway, and I'll be dead and gone so I won't give a pooh.
I was watching the movie Eulogy, a hilarious movie with an all-star cast (a tad crass, but funny), while eating noodles and it got me thinking about the subject of death. Well, that and burning boats. At any rate, if I look down from that waiting room on high and find that someone wasted more than say...$75 on my funeral and burying expenses, I'm going to come down and personally haunt them until they loose their mind and take to barking at the wall.